What could be more captivating than a HOT CHEF whose culinary skills are akin to magic?  Absolutely f**king nothing! Which is why these bitches are at THE WALNUT enjoying three fabulous courses, as we breathlessly cry: yes, yes, YES CHEF!! 

Our story begins, quite unsurprisingly, with a cheeky crémant. Making the most of BYOB, our party of four has a wine flight – seven bottles strong – taking us from bubbles to Pinot Noir and ultimately complete debauchery.

We’re also happily indulging in the Ham Hock with a pleasing dash of piccalilli, a gorgeous Roquefort Salad with chicory, pear, honey & walnuts, and a lush serving of Crispy Beef cheek & haggis croquettes.

It’s all utterly delicious. But … Isaac, resident carb-monster, insists he needs more bread with his ham hock, the rest of the table disagrees. He sulks momentarily, then recommits to eating his feelings via the next sensational course.

Though even this well-chosen superlative may not do the dish justice. The Roast Chicken with celeriac, brown butter puree, rosemary & thyme dauphinois is one of the most incredible things we’ve had the pleasure of putting in our mouths.

So while we have no intentions of EVER cooking for ourselves, we are curious as how such a wonderfully succulent beast came to be. With impeccable timing, and impeccable everything else, it’s at this point we finally meet HOT CHEF.

Striding through this bijou restaurant in slow motion, to what we imagine to be a saucy guitar solo, he flashes a dazzling smile and introduces himself. His name is Byron SUNAME – chef and owner – who is not only carrying on the Walnut’s tradition of excellence, he’s improving upon it.

Naturally we demand to know how he keeps things oh so very moist, and is he free for a drink? His answer is YES, and simply: cook high at 250 degrees for a short burst, lightly chargrill, and voila. Genius!

He’s also insisting we now sample his Walnut Whip. Oh Byron, we thought you’d never ask! This lush dessert is boasts chocolate mousse, surrounded by a spongy, sticky marshmallow that’s been lightly caramelised, and then dusted with …

Again, we look to Byron, lovely Byron, and dreamily ask: what’s your secret? Turns out this gorgeous topping is the crispy edges of a crepe, lovingly dusted with shaved walnut. The man’s a god, his menu divine, BOOK NOW!