How has it taken us SO LONG to sing the praises of NOK’S KITCHEN in Stockbridge?? Phenomenal Thai food, wonderful service, and fabulously floral wallpaper combine to offer an experience these bitches are utterly, UTTERLY addicted to.

   

Having enjoyed many a wine-soaked meal at Nok’s, our hosts are now intimately familiar with our infamous gluttony. Even better, they happily indulge our obsession with their magnificent satay sauce.

This evening, before we can even glance the wine list, and order the first of seven bottles, Pom [ our favourite sassy waiter ] rushes over with a large bowl of the stuff, and a mountain of prawn crackers.

“Knock yourselves out bitches,” he laughs. “Though it might save time if you apply the satay directly to your thighs!”

   

Naturally we ADORE this man, almost as much as his mouthwatering sauce, which we’re devouring at a rate that makes one appear much like a crack whore.

Pom rolls his eyes, “More satay bitches?”

How did he guess?? Though we’d also love a cheeky riesling, and a ridiculous amount of starters:

Pawn Tempura, Crispy Spring rolls, Sweetcorn cakes, deep-fried with red curry & kaffir lime leaf, and of course, Chicken skewers with cucumber relish and … drumroll please … EVEN MORE satay sauce.

   

But we aren’t finished yet, for what mere mortal could resist the legendary Nok Chom Suan – CUE: dramatic sound of a gong – aka Bird in the Garden …

A lush piece of edible art, both the bird and its garden are created from steamed dumpling containing juicy pork, sweet turnip, peanut & shallot, then finished with a coconut cream reduction. OOSH!

Next, we’re squaring off with the Crying Tiger – Grilled sirloin steak, aged 28 days, served with stir-fry mushrooms, and a spicy tamarind sauce – served up, rather deliciously, on a sizzling hot plate.

   

Naturally it’s no match for these bitches, but our fave dish [ satay aside ] has to be the sumptuous Stir fry Roasted Duck with a garlic & crushed black pepper sauce, paired of course with a ridiculous amount of coconut rice.

Barely able to squeeze in our Banana Fritters with ice cream, we can’t thank Pom enough for yet another glorious night. In fact he’s even inspired us to create a new ringtone: him, on high-rotation, cheekily enquiring: MORE SATAY BITCHES??